Written by Kelly Enders-Tharp. Reviewed by Dr Katherine Joseph. 

Kelly holds a B.S. in Health Science with a minor in Human Sexuality and an M.A. in Education with a multicultural emphasis from San Francisco State University. She is also a certified Perinatal Mental Health Professional. Kelly has shared her expertise on national and international stages, advancing awareness of surrogacy worldwide. A community-builder at heart, Kelly created and has managed a private Growing Generations surrogate Facebook group for more than 14 years, one of the longest-running peer support networks of its kind.

An OVUM note

This piece has been written in an educational capacity. Its publication does not constitute an endorsement by OVUM of any specific surrogacy organisation, agency, or service.

At OVUM, we believe everyone deserves access to clear, honest information about every path to parenthood. Surrogacy is one of those paths, and for many people in our community, it is a very real consideration. This piece has been written to give you a plain-English introduction to how surrogacy works in the UK. Please note: surrogacy involves significant legal considerations that vary depending on your individual circumstances. The information in this piece is intended as a general educational guide to the UK surrogacy framework. It does not constitute legal, medical, or financial advice. If you are considering surrogacy, we would always encourage you to seek independent legal advice specific to your circumstances before taking any steps.

Surrogacy in the UK

Surrogacy is one of several routes to parenthood. In the UK, the process follows a distinct legal and cultural framework that differs significantly from that of other countries. Understanding the UK-specific landscape from the outset will help you make informed decisions at every stage.

The number of parental orders granted in England and Wales rose from 117 in 2011 to 413 in 2020, reflecting a steady increase in families choosing this route. It's a path built on trust, transparency, and voluntary co-operation, and while it takes time and careful planning, it's achievable for many intended parents.

The Legal Framework

Commercial surrogacy and third-party advertising are prohibited under the Surrogacy Arrangements Act 1985. This means no organisation can legally charge a fee to match intended parents with a surrogate, and surrogates cannot be paid beyond reasonable expenses.

In the UK, the surrogate is the child's legal mother at birth, regardless of genetic connection. Parenthood is transferred to the intended parents after the birth via a parental order, a court process that can take several months. At least one intended parent must have a genetic connection to the child. The Human Fertilisation and Embryology Authority (HFEA) publishes clear guidance on who can apply and what the process involves.

What counts as reasonable expenses?

The law doesn't set out a fixed list. Reasonable expenses are the costs a surrogate incurs because of the pregnancy, and they commonly include travel to and from clinic and antenatal appointments, maternity clothing, prenatal supplements, pregnancy tests, and lost earnings if they need time off work. Childcare for the surrogate's own children, and the cost of her independent counselling and legal advice, are often covered too. Payments that go beyond what is reasonable can complicate the parental order, so it's worth keeping receipts and agreeing the detail early.

In practice, intended parents and surrogates agree what will be covered before the process starts. Non-profit organisations such as Surrogacy UK, for example, publish a list of typical expenses and ask intended parents to think through what they can realistically cover, so there is an open conversation with the surrogate from the outset.

How this compares with other countries

The UK approach is not the only one. In many US states, surrogates are paid a fee on top of their expenses, which is part of why arrangements made through US agencies cost significantly more. Canada and Australia, like the UK, allow altruistic surrogacy only, meaning a surrogate can be reimbursed for expenses but not paid for carrying a child. Other countries restrict or ban surrogacy altogether. The rules change often, so check the current position, and what it means for bringing a child home to the UK, before starting an arrangement abroad.

How Gestational Surrogacy Works

Almost all surrogacy arrangements today are gestational, meaning the surrogate has no genetic connection to the child they carry. An embryo is created using the eggs and sperm of the intended parents or donors and transferred to the surrogate's uterus through IVF. This means the surrogate enters the arrangement with a clear understanding that they are carrying a child for another family, not their own. 

How Intended Parents Find a Surrogate

There's no single required route to finding a surrogate. In practice, intended parents here have several options:

1. Non-profit surrogacy organisations such as Surrogacy UK and My Surrogacy Journey offer membership-based support and, in some cases, facilitate introductions between surrogates and intended parents. They charge membership fees to cover running costs, which is permitted under the law. Waiting times can be lengthy, and demand for surrogates currently exceeds availability through these organisations.

2. Independent matching through online communities and social media groups. This route requires careful due diligence, but it is a legitimate path that many families have taken successfully. Once you've identified someone, you arrange the support around you yourselves: it’s recommended that each side finds its own solicitor who specialises in surrogacy law, and arrange independent counselling, as well as the clinic counselling you'll be offered. A non-profit organisation may be able to point you towards specialist solicitors and counsellors even if you didn't meet your surrogate through it.

3. Personal networks, where a friend or family member offers to act as a surrogate. Almost half of surrogates in one study were family members or friends of the intended parents.

4. Surrogacy agencies in other countries, such as the US, often work with UK intended parents to find a surrogate. This is a commercial arrangement and incurs significantly higher costs than other options. Because commercial matching agencies cannot operate under UK law, intended parents find a surrogate through their own efforts, sometimes with support from a non-profit organisation.

The People Involved

Whichever route you take to find a surrogate, a surrogacy journey involves several professionals working alongside the two parties at the centre of it.

A fertility clinic and embryologist manage the medical aspects: embryo creation, the IVF protocol, the embryo transfer, and early pregnancy monitoring.

Independent legal advice is required for both the intended parents and the surrogate, not to make the agreement enforceable, since surrogacy agreements are not legally binding contracts, but to ensure both parties understand their rights and that there is a clear statement of intent.

A mental health professional, usually a counsellor experienced in fertility and surrogacy, provides screening and ongoing support throughout.

A Step-by-Step Overview of the Surrogacy Process

A surrogacy journey can take between 18 months and three years. The steps below reflect the general shape of the process, though the order and timing of some stages will vary.

1. Preparation and screening

Before searching for a surrogate, intended parents typically undergo medical assessments at a licensed fertility clinic to establish the IVF options available to them, including whether donor eggs or sperm are needed. Counselling is also standard at this stage, and a requirement before treatment can proceed.

2. Finding a surrogate

As outlined above, this looks different for everyone. Whether you connect through a non-profit organisation, an online community, or a personal network, the priority is finding someone with whom you share values and can build a genuine relationship of trust. This is often the longest and least predictable part of the process.

3. Counselling and legal advice

Once a match is made, both parties should have independent counselling and independent legal advice before any medical steps begin. If you met through a non-profit organisation, it may be able to point you towards specialists. If you found each other independently, you'll arrange this yourselves, with a separate solicitor for the intended parents and for the surrogate. Intended parents often cover the surrogate's costs for this as part of her reasonable expenses. Surrogacy agreements are not legally enforceable, but a written agreement setting out both parties' intentions and expectations is strongly recommended and is standard practice.

4. Medical treatment and pregnancy

The surrogate undergoes a medication protocol to prepare for the embryo transfer. Following a successful transfer, pregnancy is confirmed by a blood test. The surrogate receives their antenatal care from their own midwifery and obstetric team, with intended parents typically invited to attend scans and key appointments.

5. Birth and parental order

After the birth, intended parents apply to the family court for a parental order, which legally transfers parenthood from the surrogate to them. At least one intended parent must have a genetic connection to the child, and the surrogate must give full and unconditional consent. The process typically takes between six months and a year, after which a new birth certificate is issued.

The framework places significant weight on the quality of the relationship between all parties. There are no contracts to enforce that relationship; it rests on trust, clear communication, and shared expectations. Connecting with peer communities can be invaluable, both for practical guidance and for the reassurance of hearing from families who have been through the same journey.

Key Takeaways

• Surrogacy in the UK is built on trust, not contracts. Surrogacy agreements are not legally enforceable in the UK, and commercial matching is prohibited. Success depends on clear communication, independent legal and emotional support, and a genuine relationship between intended parents and their surrogate.

• Parenthood is transferred after birth, not before. The surrogate is the legal mother at birth, regardless of genetic connection. Intended parents must apply for a parental order once the baby arrives, a process that can take several months.

• Finding a surrogate takes time, and there’s no single route. Whether through a non- profit organisation, an online community, or a personal connection, each route takes time and care. There is no single ‘right’ way.